Thursday, May 1, 2008

I'm not a psychiatrist, but...

So my regular client who kept telling me that he loved me and shared all the vivid fantasies with me, finally pushed me too far.

I had tried ignoring him on the mainstage a couple times in hope that he might get the hint, but low and behold he showed up at my next private show. He seemed like he was in a weird mood, so I suggested that I just give him a nice show without any fantasies. I also explained that I had hurt myself at the gym very badly the day before so my normal flexibility was incredibly compromised. About five minutes into the show he got very pushy, "spread it wider" kind of pushy and I reminded him that I was hurt and couldn't. Apparently this was not convincing enough because his harsh tone increased.
Maybe if he had still been paying me what he used to I would have put up with it, but I got a little sharp and said "Honey, I'll only stick it in if you ask me nicely". He gave me a puzzled look and said "I'm not asking you nicely? I'm not being polite? You know what? You're fucking right! I shouldn't even fucking be here!" At this point he had taken off the headphones that allows him to hear me and thrown them on the ground. "I'm fucking in love with you and there's nothing I can do to get over it!" He then stormed out of the booth.

Initially I was pretty shaken up over this whole encounter, "is this guy gonna follow me home?" or "is he going to keep trying to come in my booth to freak out?" After talking to some of the other girls, it dawned upon me. This guy has been coming into the Lusty for years, but for some reason I've convinced myself I was somehow the special one. As the subject says, I'm not a psychiatrist but my best analysis is that he probably does this whole act every once in a while. Finds a new girl, creates a work-based relationship and then convinces them that he is in love with them. Why? So that they think of him outside of work! TADA! He gets off on imaging me worrying about him or his actions.
I suppose it's naive of me to hope that our customers think of us as intelligent enough to actually think critically of our experiences. Granted, there are a lot of days when I just want to go home and not think about work, but so far I haven't gotten very good at that.
Anyway, I've avoided him pretty well since then, sometimes I think I see him in the one ways,
but I'm trying not to worry too much, because I know that's what he wants.